Baseball announcers are to instant replay what literally everyone is to Valentine’s Day. Mentioning the holiday results in a passionate opinion that is inherently wrong just because it exists. Basically, it’s what happens when you bring up Bryce Harper, but with questions about when you’re bringing a boy home, Mom.
This year, the Nationals pitchers and catchers will be reporting on the 14th, producing anticipation of the steamiest Valentine’s Day on record. In preparation, here’s a rundown of some options for the perfect man on the mound or behind the plate to act as an unofficial Valentine.