An independent Washington Nationals news, opinion, and analysis site

Tag Archives: Ryan Zimmerman

Ryan Zimmerman Really Has Improved His Launch Angle

2017 Articles Leave a Comment

{Exterior, Ryan Zimmerman’s house, October 14, 2016, Virginia Beach, VA}

Zimmerman steps out onto his spacious porch overlooking the Atlantic. You can see the weight of the season on his shoulders. He wistfully looks out over the waves, and sighs.

ZIMMERMAN: Never again. Something has to change. No, damn it. I have to change.

{camera pans up to the setting sun as ominous bass notes play underneath}

(Writer’s note: …I made all that up)

Continue Reading Ryan Zimmerman Really Has Improved His Launch Angle

Nats Power Rankings: April 17

2017 Articles 1 Comment

Welcome to the first in a series, in which we review the previous week in Nationals baseball and power rank the players according to their performance. This is an extremely unserious exercise; at no point should it ever be confused with actual baseball analysis. Don’t worry, I will do my best to make sure that is obvious. Without further ado: your Washington Nationals, ranked according to power.

Continue Reading Nats Power Rankings: April 17

Gio Shines, Bullpen Flounders Against Marlins

2017 Articles Leave a Comment

162-0 is an impossible dream, and more recently an annoying twitter campaign for every fan after Opening Day. It was, however, nice to keep the dream alive for an extra game this year. The Nationals will have to settle for 161-1 after dropping the final game of their opening series to the Marlins 4-3 in extra innings on Thursday night.

Continue Reading Gio Shines, Bullpen Flounders Against Marlins

Nats Celebrate Christmas

2016 Articles Leave a Comment

With Rhett Wiseman, RC Orlan, and Nick Rickles still in the minors, there are no Jewish Nationals at the major league level. So, while the first night of Hanukah and Christmas eve fell on the same night, setting up the potential for a cross-holiday social media spectacular, a naked baby Eaton in a Santa hat and Ryan Zimmerman juggling limes will do just fine in its place.

Continue Reading Nats Celebrate Christmas

Ryan Zimmerman is Struggling

2016 Articles Leave a Comment

The Nationals have a problem, they have a black hole at first base. I mean that figuratively of course; the Nationals have gotten the least offensive production out of first base in all of baseball. There may be a hole in the space time continuum at first, though, because Ryan Zimmerman has gone missing this season. Zimmerman’s .213/.269/.365 batting is far from acceptable from a first baseman. In fact, it makes him the worst offensive first baseman in all of baseball. He might as well have been pulled into The Upside Down.

Continue Reading Ryan Zimmerman is Struggling

Off-the-Field Recap: Scherzer Family Bonding

2016 Articles Leave a Comment

The last time the number seven was this magic was when Barry Bonds wore it for his introduction to Major League Baseball in ‘86. Checking the NL East standings to make sure that the Mets haven’t been automatically knocked out for signing Tim Tebow will reveal that the magic number now sits at seven. That magic in the air might be why the Nats hit peak fun off-the-field this past week.

Continue Reading Off-the-Field Recap: Scherzer Family Bonding

Off-the-Field Recap: I Want to Be Your Favorite, Maybe

2016 Articles Leave a Comment

Of all callous things in baseball, a pitcher’s arm cares the least about how the season is supposed to go. Stephen Strasburg’s only natural enemies are the sun and the whole right side of his body. But this isn’t about the strained flexor mass in the pitcher’s right arm, or the dark embrace of the September Disabled List. It’s about what the Nationals did off-field to provide some distraction from the image of Strasburg exiting, glove covering his mouth. Buffalo-back rides and walk-up songs might just suffice.

Continue Reading Off-the-Field Recap: I Want to Be Your Favorite, Maybe